Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Pastor's What?
At church this weekend a woman introduced herself and asked me if my husband is a pastor. I paused, because that kind of question is new to me. After my brief hesitation I pointed at Scott and said I was married to him. I thought that was a good response which clarified who my husband was, and she could draw whatever pastor" conclusions she wanted from there. But I guess my response wasn't as brilliant as I thought, because the question came back via rephrasing. She referred to Scott as the pastor and asked me if I'm the pastor's wife. Now faced with the same kind of question twice, I had to answer yes.
A long time ago Scott blogged about being at the US border and having been asked what his profession was. He struggled with no longer answering that he was a minister, but instead saying he worked in the IT field. I found the reverse to be true on Saturday. I'm not used to being connected with a pastor, whether you think he is officially one or not. There are so many preconceptions about pastors and what qualities their wives possess.
Almost one year ago we were painting the cafe that we are about to repaint next week. Lori and Tysey and Rose were with me, and the topic turned to being a pastor's wife. Questions were asked like: Do I feel different in that role than others I've had (like banking)? How do I feel about it?
My response was that at that time I didn't feel any different married to a church planter than not married to a church planter. I don't feel that I have to be a certain way, and maybe that's because our "church" is small and by traditional church standards insignificant. I don't have to lead a woman's group, play the piano in church, counsel women, head up the prayer chain, arrange for meals to be taken to widows and sick people. If God told me that I should do those things I would - well, maybe we would have to get more sick people and start a prayer chain first. I sing in church because I like to, and there is a spot for me. Scott teaches a Bible Study in our home, and I am one of the people who provides food because I like to. I have relationships within the church because we are in community and that's what community is about.
I don't have a problem being a pastor's wife. I do have a problem with those who might think this should denote a certain level of involvement or behaviour or mannerism based on stereotyping. Here is what I believe.
We are all called to be the ministers of the gospel. I've said it before. So, that means that although Scott might spend concentrated pockets of time doing church work and is expected to put in a certain amount of time with the people and the event, he is doing his piece of calling. I am doing mine, Lori hers, Rose hers, Mat his, Sam hers and on down the line. We are all the same, and all have our impact for Christ.
A long time ago Scott blogged about being at the US border and having been asked what his profession was. He struggled with no longer answering that he was a minister, but instead saying he worked in the IT field. I found the reverse to be true on Saturday. I'm not used to being connected with a pastor, whether you think he is officially one or not. There are so many preconceptions about pastors and what qualities their wives possess.
Almost one year ago we were painting the cafe that we are about to repaint next week. Lori and Tysey and Rose were with me, and the topic turned to being a pastor's wife. Questions were asked like: Do I feel different in that role than others I've had (like banking)? How do I feel about it?
My response was that at that time I didn't feel any different married to a church planter than not married to a church planter. I don't feel that I have to be a certain way, and maybe that's because our "church" is small and by traditional church standards insignificant. I don't have to lead a woman's group, play the piano in church, counsel women, head up the prayer chain, arrange for meals to be taken to widows and sick people. If God told me that I should do those things I would - well, maybe we would have to get more sick people and start a prayer chain first. I sing in church because I like to, and there is a spot for me. Scott teaches a Bible Study in our home, and I am one of the people who provides food because I like to. I have relationships within the church because we are in community and that's what community is about.
I don't have a problem being a pastor's wife. I do have a problem with those who might think this should denote a certain level of involvement or behaviour or mannerism based on stereotyping. Here is what I believe.
We are all called to be the ministers of the gospel. I've said it before. So, that means that although Scott might spend concentrated pockets of time doing church work and is expected to put in a certain amount of time with the people and the event, he is doing his piece of calling. I am doing mine, Lori hers, Rose hers, Mat his, Sam hers and on down the line. We are all the same, and all have our impact for Christ.
// posted by Annette @ 3:53 p.m. 