Sunday, September 10, 2006
The charade is over
Like all new relationships, Scott and I still are a bit careful about letting the other person know we are "real". Farts and burps are apologized for - after I giggle at myself. Anything smelly is repressed. I remember a friend of mine commenting about a new relationship she was in, with someone who had been a friend of the family. They had all gone on camping trips together many times and she had seen the man in many states of behaviour. He had joined the other family/friends in farting and burping contests. My friend Fern said to me "I know he farts because I've heard it before. But now that we're dating it's like his butt is airtight!"
The first several days we were married, we were so polite. No smells around each other. Isn't that how it should be? But oh, that was shattered 5 days into the honeymoon.
Since the Courtyard Grill kicked us out that first time, we ate under the stars in a Jamaican flavour restaurant. It was romantic and beautiful. The meal took a long time to come, but when you're relaxing it makes little difference. I had the jerk chicken, he had the jerk shrimp. Several hours later, at 3:30 in the morning, something was jerking around our stomachs. Scott ran to the bathroom, waking me slightly. Picture the lovely bathroom door. It housed only the toilet, and the door consisted of slats open at an angle. Closed enough so that we couldn't see in, but open enough to let the "air" through.
I heard noises from the toilet room, and then the odor followed. The best I could muster up at that sleepy hour was a groggy "Are you still not feeling well?" I think Scott was in the process of throwing up 8 times as well. Thus began a long night. At one point I was in the toilet room with stomach pains and dizziness. Alas, nothing ensued. I was disappointed, as it had been many days since anything had ensued. Later the next morning we called the nurse to the room, who gave Scott some medicine and told me that my problem could be fixed with a simple suppository. I got no sympathy for my stomach cramps. It was all about Scott.
It was a rough 24 hours. All pretenses of hoping to keep only lovely things between us had faded. The next while became about discussing our bodily functions or the lack thereof. I had begun to take Ex-lax. Just one, because I am a small person. Several hours later I took another one. Nothing. Scott was still having lots of "somethings" happening. Then I got fed up and took 2 more pills one night. Scott's condition had improved...just in time for my pills to take effect. Thank goodness there were bathrooms at the beach.
Early on in this marriage we have had to take down the facades. It's going to be a smelly road ahead.
The first several days we were married, we were so polite. No smells around each other. Isn't that how it should be? But oh, that was shattered 5 days into the honeymoon.
Since the Courtyard Grill kicked us out that first time, we ate under the stars in a Jamaican flavour restaurant. It was romantic and beautiful. The meal took a long time to come, but when you're relaxing it makes little difference. I had the jerk chicken, he had the jerk shrimp. Several hours later, at 3:30 in the morning, something was jerking around our stomachs. Scott ran to the bathroom, waking me slightly. Picture the lovely bathroom door. It housed only the toilet, and the door consisted of slats open at an angle. Closed enough so that we couldn't see in, but open enough to let the "air" through.
I heard noises from the toilet room, and then the odor followed. The best I could muster up at that sleepy hour was a groggy "Are you still not feeling well?" I think Scott was in the process of throwing up 8 times as well. Thus began a long night. At one point I was in the toilet room with stomach pains and dizziness. Alas, nothing ensued. I was disappointed, as it had been many days since anything had ensued. Later the next morning we called the nurse to the room, who gave Scott some medicine and told me that my problem could be fixed with a simple suppository. I got no sympathy for my stomach cramps. It was all about Scott.
It was a rough 24 hours. All pretenses of hoping to keep only lovely things between us had faded. The next while became about discussing our bodily functions or the lack thereof. I had begun to take Ex-lax. Just one, because I am a small person. Several hours later I took another one. Nothing. Scott was still having lots of "somethings" happening. Then I got fed up and took 2 more pills one night. Scott's condition had improved...just in time for my pills to take effect. Thank goodness there were bathrooms at the beach.
Early on in this marriage we have had to take down the facades. It's going to be a smelly road ahead.
// posted by Annette @ 10:49 p.m. 