Wednesday, July 05, 2006
The little that I know
I've been sloppy about posting more regularly because life is...busy. You can probably attest to that in your life too. I haven't had tons of time for formulation of theories, theologies, psycho-analysis. I've been living a multi-faceted life, as most of you also have. There has been enough time to think about my temperament through these changes and occurences. Here is one thing I have thought about.
Matthew has usually been a fabulous sleeper. At 8 months when brought home, he slept through the night. There were a few crying episodes around 10:00, which proved to be gas. He has always slept long and hard. But when he turned 4, going to bed wasn't so easy.
The most grief would usually happen right before bed. That would lead to me sitting on the edge of the bed talking with Matthew and trying to teach him how to avoid trouble the next time. At first I think Matthew stumbled into the opportunity to stay awake later and have my attention purely by behavioural "accident". I don't think he attributed the behaviour with being able to stay up later and talk, but sometimes it became too regular. It became evident that it was becoming too "coincidental". By then it migrated to him wanting to talk about something from his day or something emotional or ask me a question that would feed into the teaching aspect of my charcter. He had me hooked. It took me a while to figure it out but thank goodness I did.
When Matthew would misbehave before bed because of attention seeking or fatigue it was easy for me to take that last interaction and colour the whole day with it. 12 hours of great times and fun, 30 minutes of frustration, means a bad day.
It became a good tool to teach me how to look at other things in my life, and not colour them with the most recent emotional experience. I have learned to weigh my experiences and relationships keeping the whole picture forefront. This has also taught me to watch what I say. The wrong word said in such a time of emotional involvement can create more frustration and in some cases memory scars.
I know in here there is a lesson about friendships. They all go through seasons, and sometimes they season us (haha) more than we want them to. I've been in some relationships where on certain days I wonder why I'm there. Maybe the experience wasn't so great that day. I have stuck it out, and reap the benefits of still being there with them. Sometimes more than I could have imagined. As much as it might have been the natural tendency, the "last 30 minutes" didn't win over the previous 12 hours. It wasn't always easy, and sometimes now it might not be. But God has used some of this to bless and teach me.
And that's my rambling. As deep as the thoughts get right now. Although, there is another one forming....much shorter than this one.
Matthew has usually been a fabulous sleeper. At 8 months when brought home, he slept through the night. There were a few crying episodes around 10:00, which proved to be gas. He has always slept long and hard. But when he turned 4, going to bed wasn't so easy.
The most grief would usually happen right before bed. That would lead to me sitting on the edge of the bed talking with Matthew and trying to teach him how to avoid trouble the next time. At first I think Matthew stumbled into the opportunity to stay awake later and have my attention purely by behavioural "accident". I don't think he attributed the behaviour with being able to stay up later and talk, but sometimes it became too regular. It became evident that it was becoming too "coincidental". By then it migrated to him wanting to talk about something from his day or something emotional or ask me a question that would feed into the teaching aspect of my charcter. He had me hooked. It took me a while to figure it out but thank goodness I did.
When Matthew would misbehave before bed because of attention seeking or fatigue it was easy for me to take that last interaction and colour the whole day with it. 12 hours of great times and fun, 30 minutes of frustration, means a bad day.
It became a good tool to teach me how to look at other things in my life, and not colour them with the most recent emotional experience. I have learned to weigh my experiences and relationships keeping the whole picture forefront. This has also taught me to watch what I say. The wrong word said in such a time of emotional involvement can create more frustration and in some cases memory scars.
I know in here there is a lesson about friendships. They all go through seasons, and sometimes they season us (haha) more than we want them to. I've been in some relationships where on certain days I wonder why I'm there. Maybe the experience wasn't so great that day. I have stuck it out, and reap the benefits of still being there with them. Sometimes more than I could have imagined. As much as it might have been the natural tendency, the "last 30 minutes" didn't win over the previous 12 hours. It wasn't always easy, and sometimes now it might not be. But God has used some of this to bless and teach me.
And that's my rambling. As deep as the thoughts get right now. Although, there is another one forming....much shorter than this one.
// posted by Annette @ 9:34 p.m. 