Tuesday, April 04, 2006
What is There to be Thankful For?
Once Matthew was adopted, I became quickly accustomed to the thought of a "complete" family meaning two children. The Adoption section of the government came to visit after Matthew had been home for a couple weeks, and I was told that they would solicit another application as soon as 6 months. I hadn't even entertained the idea of adopting again so soon, and it scared me a bit, because I was getting used to a brand new child.
I found Matthew so easy when he was tiny. Compliant, fun, energetic (of course), loving. Plus, at the age of 1 he napped every 3 hours, for 2 hours each time. He also slept 12 hours at night. In other words, he slept a lot. At that point in time, a couple friends asked me if parenting him was tough. I told them that it was really easy, and that I wanted more of a challenge. Crazy me.
Much later the second adoption application was filled out. It was difficult to find a "healthy" child the second time around, and there were big disappointments. There were notifications of a couple available children, but the potential complications were more than we deemed manageable for the current family. Ending up with only one child was a good thing, but while working through the emotions of the "close calls" it was very hard.
At one point I talked with my pastor, and spoke of shaky faith. I've referred that that period of time in previous posts. I kept telling myself that I was being selfish and letting something bother me that shouldn't. In times like that I reminded myself how fortunate I am here in Canada. My family hasn't been killed by a bomb and took my leg off. I don't live with rickets and life threatening disease. I haven't been prostituted to make an income for the family. Compared to these things, my complaints were petty. When discouraged it's tough to keep that perspective, and I didn't always win the course. But I kept trying.
What do people in those other situations have to be thankful for? I'm sure if asked, some of them would have an answer. I cannot fathom. But I know for my small part, that what you believe or how you feel is derived by a choice. Some is environment, but a huge factor is what you do with the emotional part of it. Sometimes you too might wonder what there is to be thankful for.
I found this responsive Psalm. I don't know if it was a song or a reading. I can picture it being sung back and forth.
Thank GOD! He deserves your thanks. His love never quits.
Thank the God of all gods, His love never quits.
Thank the Lord of all lords. His love never quits.
Thank the miracle-working God, His love never quits.
The God whose skill formed the cosmos, His love never quits.
The God who laid out earth on ocean foundations, His love never quits.
The God who filled the skies with light, His love never quits.
The sun to watch over the day, His love never quits.
Moon and stars as guardians of the night, His love never quits.
(Psalm 136:1-9)
I found Matthew so easy when he was tiny. Compliant, fun, energetic (of course), loving. Plus, at the age of 1 he napped every 3 hours, for 2 hours each time. He also slept 12 hours at night. In other words, he slept a lot. At that point in time, a couple friends asked me if parenting him was tough. I told them that it was really easy, and that I wanted more of a challenge. Crazy me.
Much later the second adoption application was filled out. It was difficult to find a "healthy" child the second time around, and there were big disappointments. There were notifications of a couple available children, but the potential complications were more than we deemed manageable for the current family. Ending up with only one child was a good thing, but while working through the emotions of the "close calls" it was very hard.
At one point I talked with my pastor, and spoke of shaky faith. I've referred that that period of time in previous posts. I kept telling myself that I was being selfish and letting something bother me that shouldn't. In times like that I reminded myself how fortunate I am here in Canada. My family hasn't been killed by a bomb and took my leg off. I don't live with rickets and life threatening disease. I haven't been prostituted to make an income for the family. Compared to these things, my complaints were petty. When discouraged it's tough to keep that perspective, and I didn't always win the course. But I kept trying.
What do people in those other situations have to be thankful for? I'm sure if asked, some of them would have an answer. I cannot fathom. But I know for my small part, that what you believe or how you feel is derived by a choice. Some is environment, but a huge factor is what you do with the emotional part of it. Sometimes you too might wonder what there is to be thankful for.
I found this responsive Psalm. I don't know if it was a song or a reading. I can picture it being sung back and forth.
Thank GOD! He deserves your thanks. His love never quits.
Thank the God of all gods, His love never quits.
Thank the Lord of all lords. His love never quits.
Thank the miracle-working God, His love never quits.
The God whose skill formed the cosmos, His love never quits.
The God who laid out earth on ocean foundations, His love never quits.
The God who filled the skies with light, His love never quits.
The sun to watch over the day, His love never quits.
Moon and stars as guardians of the night, His love never quits.
(Psalm 136:1-9)
// posted by Annette @ 11:10 p.m. 