be-musings

Today Matthew and I rode our bikes and I let him “call the shots”. We ended up at the nearby school, where Matthew spotted some kids doing bike jumps over dirt moguls. You can guess – we ended up joining them. Well, we went down the hill several times, but not exactly over the jumps. We went between them. That was scary enough for both of us. A few times I slowly rode to the top of the jumps, but instead of careening down the other side and over the next one took the chicken way of down the side. I was trying (unsuccessfully) to calculate the best and least damaging way of maneuvering. Matthew as well. We didn’t let it bother us, but instead agreed that we would need to practice to get braver and better. What did I just commit to doing?
This reminds me of a person who said the road of life is filled of bumps, and we spend a fair bit of time maneuvering these obstacles. I think of these as speed bumps.
People handle these things in many ways. I can think of some who scream through the parking lot, recklessly heading to the speed bump, not paying attention to its proximity. Can you see them, hitting the raised area at full speed, with the force of the momentum catapulting the vehicle and setting it off course for a moment? You can probably think of someone like that right now. You know very well that the person squeals or laughs with delight as the thrill hits them. What a ride! There might be some damage, but all things are viewed as fixable or replaceable if there is.
Some people are the total opposite. They drive painfully slow, anticipating every bump too far ahead of time. They feel they are "responsible" people. They make sure every move is planed, and the level of every bump is known. They hide their fear in calculated moves. It prevents them from enjoying the road in between the obstacles.
You know, some people like the obstacles. It invigorates them. Yeah, life sucks sometimes, but the uncertainty keeps the blood tingling. For others the speed bumps become what the road consists of. Nothing else. And those bumps aren’t a good thing.
I probably don’t need to tell you which camp I am closest to. Lately all I see are huge mountains and no straight road. So this week I’m talking to myself about it. I’m asking myself to become more…no less…realistic. Because lately for me to be “realistic” is to notice how difficult something is. That leads to feeling like the people in the old anti-cigarette smoking commercials. You remember; the ones where the pretty people lit up and then shriveled? I don’t want that to be me. It’s going to take work, but it’s going to take Joy as well. I want to become more like those of you in the reckless camp. Not totally though. Just enough so that I get up enough speed to at least hear the struts flexing when I hit the speed bump. Or maybe squeal as I hit that first bike jump. It’s a dream that can become a reality.